Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
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Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Jul 20, 2021 4:54:28 GMT
Dear Mrs Regina Black,
This letter is to formally inform you of our client's, Sirius Lee Black, intent to file for divorce. As you share no monetary assets or property with Mr Black, it is his wish that the divorce be uncontested. Any matter of child custody shall be determined by the Head Warlock, pending the child's birth. Please note that this letter also serves as notice of eviction. You will have 30 days to vacate Mr Black's property in Glastonbury, England. If, at such time, you or your belongings still reside at the aforementioned property, further legal action will be taken.
Should you wish to contact Mr Black regarding these proceedings, please send correspondence via owl care of: Ditcher, Quik, & Hyde Family Law Solicitor
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Jul 20, 2021 4:09:41 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
"I can’t wait,” he said forcing a smile as he looked at her. Sirius had no idea what he was going to do about the baby. Short of pushing her down the stairs, there wasn’t much he could do at this point and while he might have callously suggested while drunk that he’d be okay if she took a tumble, he wasn’t actually the sort of person to follow through with any such thing. The rest of his family might have been that sort, they were still unclear about how exactly Uncle Alphard had died and with him being wiped off the Black Family Tapestry so shortly after his death, Sirius wouldn’t have put it past his father to have orchestrated something in the kind man’s demise. No, he wasn’t going to hurt Regina, or force a miscarriage, but that didn’t mean he was going to keep up this marriage charade any longer. It had gone on far too long as it was, and humor he had once found in drunkenly marrying a pop star had long since worn tired.
The second she was gone, Sirius went into the bedroom and found his trousers and a shirt that didn’t have any visible stains or overwhelming odor under the arms. He dressed as quickly as possible, checking the window every few minutes just to make sure Regina had really left, then trotted down to the street and hopped on his motorcycle. He wasn’t sure where exactly to find a divorce solicitor, but he wasn’t going home until he had one on retainer.
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Jul 19, 2021 4:25:26 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
Sirius wanted to scream. Honestly, he did. He wanted to pick her up by unusually pointy shoulders and shake her like a maraca while shouting “what the bloody hell is wrong with you, woman!” but he didn’t. He didn’t even growl, groan, or roll his eyes. Instead, he took a deep breath to steady himself. He knew what he needed to do. “You’re right. I’ll tell Peter I’m leaving. I’ll see you at home, darling.” He moved across the short distance between them and kissed her forehead tenderly.
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Jul 12, 2021 3:02:43 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
Finally, she was coming to her senses. Even if she thought it was her idea to have this little break up chat, at least it was happening. Thank sodding Merlin. Sirius moved into the living room as Regina sat on the sofa but he did not sit with her as she indicated. Instead, he stood near the chair opposite her and waited for her to speak, not bothering to curb his need to scratch his arse in front of her.
template by Slither[googlefont="Kristi"]
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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|
Post by Sirius Lee Black on Jul 3, 2021 19:28:25 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
She was completely off her rocker and even the suggestion of sexy times was not enough to sway Sirius. Was it? He hesitated but then shook his head. No. Not this time. Probably. Maybe. “Listen very carefully, Regina. We are not a thing. Do you understand? Not a couple.” He was speaking very slowly as if she were learning impaired or at the least very, very drunk. “It was a laugh at the beginning but the joke’s worn tired. Alright?” He was angry and bewildered and he couldn’t stop staring at her stomach or her enlarged tits.
template by Slither[googlefont="Kristi"]
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on May 10, 2021 4:11:55 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
"I'm not...You're not going to... What the hell is your problem, woman?!" Sirius was at a clear loss for words. He and his mates joked often about how Regina was clearly not all right in the head, and after enough chats with Remus, James, and even Lily, Sirius could see where he might have led Regina on a bit, but he really thought he'd been clear this time. Telling her to abort their baby and then leaving for more than a month should have been straight forward enough. Apparently not.
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on May 10, 2021 3:31:01 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
"Nooo." Sirius looked at her as though her head had come off her neck and was floating above her body. "You are supposed to be gone. I know you're a bloody loon and all that, but come off it. Enough is enough." Sirius dropped the orange juice onto the counter.
template by Slither[googlefont="Kristi"]
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on May 9, 2021 22:43:48 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
The last several weeks had been a long-needed reprieve from the weird turn his life had taken as of late. It had been forever since he'd thought of Regina, their ill-conceived marriage, or of the baby he assumed had been aborted by now. He was having plenty of fun crashing with Wormtail as if they were still in the dorms back at Hogwarts, only now with more booze, female companions (for him at least - Peter was shockingly lacking in that department), and loads more freedom to come and go as they pleased. Sirius was having a right good time doing absolutely fuck all with his day until he heard Regina's voice coming from the front room. When he'd heard the lock turning, he had assumed it was his flatmate home early from work, and not given a second thought to walking around the apartment in nothing but his boxers and rummaging through the fridge looking for something to eat. He nearly dropped the jug of orange juice he'd been holding, but managed to stand himself upright and kick the refrigerator door closed with his foot as he turned to the sound of her voice. "What're you doing here?" he asked, his jaw dropping as his eyes fell on her swollen stomach which very much resembled Sirius' own gut after finishing a two large pizzas by himself on a dare.
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Jan 20, 2021 4:01:41 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
It was clear that everyone agreed with him; Regina was a basket case. All he needed to do was lay low until this whole thing resolved itself. Regina would get it all taken care of, they'd get a proper divorce, and he'd only ever have to see when he passed by one of her poster outside a concert hall or something. Hell, she could turn the whole thing into a song, for all he bloody cared, so long as she was gone. "I'm gonna need to crash here for a bit," he told Peter, not even bothering to feign asking because he knew it wouldn't be a problem. If Pete ever needed the same from him, his place would always be open to him. That was just the sort of friends they were. Tell, don't ask. "Fuckin' women, man." He finished his beer and headed to the kitchen for another.
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Jan 19, 2021 4:05:34 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
“No idea. I was out of there.” He may come to regret the way he handled Regina in that moment but Sirius was still too worked up over it all to get to that point. Annoyed, he stood and began pacing the length of Peter’s couch. “I mean, what the hell was I supposed to say? I can’t have a kid with her! She’s an absolute nut!”
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Jan 15, 2021 18:26:18 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
Finally Wormtail was catching up to the proper level of shock and… well, shock! This was sodding shocking news, not something you just casually sat with a beer and chatted about. The bitch had trapped him in this fake marriage and now she’d gotten herself knocked up. Sirius would loved to have believed it wasn’t his kid, but Regina was absolutely obsessed with him, he couldn’t see her fooling around on him, not that he would have minded. It would have been a blessing to find out Regina was screwing other blokes, because then he wouldn’t feel so bad about messing around with other witches. Not that he had done so often – Regina sort of put a damper on his sex life. And not that he should have felt bad about it when it had happened, because they weren’t actually married. Not really. Only in the legal sense but apparently shit like this happened in Vegas all the time. How come people never talked about the fallout of drunken Les Vegas weddings? No way in bloody hell did they all live happily ever after. “I told her to get rid of it,” he answered bitterly, taking another big swig of his beer, but it didn’t calm the rage.
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Oct 27, 2020 19:43:47 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
Regina’s fawning was growing evermore annoying and while he enjoyed watching James and Lily join in with poking fun at her, he was actually quite pleased when Remus suggested they switch gears and head to the table. He could keep Regina’s hands busy with her food instead of fondling him like a new puppy. “There’s a good lad,” he said to Harry as he plopped him carefully into his highchair next to where Lily and James would be sitting, then reluctantly took his seat next to Regina. “Looks great, Evans,” Sirius said as he scooped a large helping of potatoes onto his plate.
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Oct 27, 2020 19:30:57 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
Peter was a good friend. Even without knowing what Sirius was on about, he was right by his side, agreeing blindly. That non-judgmental, blind faith was exactly what Sirius needed right now. Merlin knew he couldn’t find it at home. “She wants a baby,” he said with a whine, scrunching his eyes up and furrowing his brow as if he could will the idea away. No such luck. Sirius leaned forward on the couch and reached for the beer that was waiting for him. “She’s already gone and got herself pregnant! Fucking….” He sneered and shook his head instead of calling her a foul name and then took a very large swig of beer before hanging his head in defeat.
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Aug 14, 2020 3:23:55 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
“Bloody hell, Wormtail. She’s really lost the plot this time!” Sirius let himself into the flat, having been muttering to himself the entire time he was trudging up the building’s stairs, announcing himself seemingly mid-conversation. There was no need for formalities and certainly there wasn’t the time! Regina was trying to trap him with a sodding baby!!! There weren’t enough exclamation marks in the whole of Britain to convey the shock, horror, and urgency of the matter.
Peter, for his part, seemed as though he’d been readying himself all morning for this conversation. There was even an extra beer waiting for him on the ring-stained coffee table in front of the scrawny bloke. “I told you she was a loon! A complete nutter. They ought to lock her up at St Mungo’s and throw away the key.” He plopped down onto the sofa, leaving enough space between him and Peter that two more men could have sat there, and sank into the cushions. He let out an anguished groan as his head fell backwards and he stared at the ceiling. There were spots of something on the ceiling, most likely old beer from when Sirius had attempted to chug a pint while doing a handstand and ended up crashing into the table and catapulting the other mugs of beer across the room. The splatter looked like a constellation, but he wasn’t sure what the picture was supposed to be. Probably a sodding baby, the way his luck was going.
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Order of the Phoenix
all about the witches
Sexuality
Married to the amazingly psycho, Regina Black!
Relationship Status
Failed Auror slash Genius // layabout // amazing husband
Occupation
|
Slither
Offline
Tag me @sirius
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Post by Sirius Lee Black on Aug 3, 2020 4:53:59 GMT
I am a responsible adult now, let's go get some candy
“I do. I bloody well mean it. You’re insane. You’re a nutter! This isn’t a real marriage and we are not having a kid. Just get it taken care of and fuck off.” He was out the door and on his motorbike without even a solitary look back at his house or the crazy witch. He had to get out of there and fast. If he stayed there’d be no telling what he would do but he felt as though he was about to leave his body and the only thing grounding him was the thought of jumping on his bike and flying off as fast as he could. So that is precisely what he did. He wasn’t sure where he was going until he arrived, but as the tires touched the ground outside of James’ and Lily’s house, Sirius felt the anger surge again, through no fault of his mate’s. He couldn’t storm in and rage about Regina falling pregnant in front of Harry. A brief moment of clarity had Sirius spinning around and heading somewhere he was sure not to be judged; Wormtail’s.
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